Woman of Substance

Love Your Girl Friends.

Born as yourself, you became a daughter, a sister, a girlfriend, a wife and a mother. You are no longer yourself. You are now a woman. Woman, you are always evolving. You think you are lost, because the evolution keeps changing you. True, you are. There are days, when you miss yourself. Days when you don’t know what your favorite food or color is, because you as pure as the first winter snow have absorbed and taken it all in. They say, evolution is the way of life. Nothing can stop it and yet you want it to stop so you can discover yourself again. But why? Why do you want to discover yourself again? Why not discover this new evolved being? Evolution is not bad, for it gives you a chance to improve again and yet again. You are not stagnant. You are alive for you change every day. You bend, twist and conform to the mold and yet you are supple enough to spring out of the mold when you no longer deemed it fit.

Woman, you love unconditionally. You tore to come into this world. The world applauds you for you are the cradle of civilization. Without you there would be no world and yet, the same world ridicules your decision to feed and not climb the ladder of ambition. You continue to love, ask no questions and love more. You love the parents who held your hand and taught you to stand tall, you love your sister for she is your confidante, you love your brother for he protects you always and you love your friends for they share your tears and smiles alike. You then found a man and you felt complete. You are faithful. Temptation is not your weakness. You are honest and loyal. You fight for your world and make him the king of your little kingdom. You continue to walk hand in hand and you tore yet again to bring life into this world. The world kept evolving and so did you.

Today, as you watch the world go by: Woman, you yearn. You yearn for your friends. You miss the mud puddles, the lunch boxes, the pillion rides, the secret diaries, the hushed whispers, the coy smiles, the side glances and yourself.

Yes, you miss yourself.

Woman, you are smart. “You know the loneliest woman is NOT the woman without a man, but the woman without a close woman friend.” You know you need your sister friends to laugh and cry. You know you need them to sustain. Why did you let them go? You realize that you made time for ambition while your friends waited. They could wait no loner and left you to enjoy the view from atop the ladder. You look down and you see no one. You have everything, and yet you feel you are missing. You take down the old chest and pull out the secret diary. You look at the pictures and the smiles, you pick up your phone and pray someone picks up the phone. The phone rings and you hear a voice. You smile. You are in love again; in love with yourself.

Today, you love your children more. Their questions don’t confuse you. Their needs don’t tire you. Today, you are filled with gratitude for a man who lets you be. He notices the smile and smiles back. Today, you realize you have your friends back in your life. Friends who listen to you for hours, friends who make time for you, friends who scream in joy for your success, friends who giggle at your silly anecdotes on life, friends who tell you it’s going to be okay. Today, the giggles, the smiles, whispers and the diary is back.

Today, you realize your girl friends make you better. They empower you. You promise yourself to never let your friends disappear again.

Happy Valentine’s Day to all my girls out there!

Blessed I am – are you?

Very excited today to be sharing a guest blog post by a very dear friend. She had asked me to do a blog post on college memories…. and for me college was a mixed bag of emotions, happiness entwined with pain, mystic, confusion, anger and in the end amazing friendships. So I quickly turned it around and invited her to do a guest blog post.. and I have to say, her perspective and and capture of Techno is brighter than mine. So, here you go. The moments from Techno by a very dear friend Seema Abhale. While I was trying to understand why I took admission in engineering ( I still wonder how and why I ended up there :)) she had it all figured out and today is the proud owner of Prakruti Environmental Engineers. The girl has successfully established a business in an industry that has traditionally been dominated my men. She is everything you would a friend to be. I hope you enjoy the innocence of this post.

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BLESSED I AM _ ARE YOU? by Seema Abhale.

“And there I stand in the centre square of the Faculty of Technology & Engineering of the renowned University The Maharaja Sayajirao Universtiy of Vadodara,wondering whether it’s a dream or really I am at the place which I always dreamt to be as a kid!! Ooouch… i am really there!!

10537325_10152562966368104_2786596305459924115_n — The entrance to the College. Little did I know that I will build lifetime of friendships here.

I had always known this place but today as I stand here I am totally lost; as though the place is flooded with same race; can hardly see anyone known! Timid, publicly shy as I am; started my stride through the crowd towards the steps that took us to the lobby where my class would be. My heart is pounding of anxiety; the most exciting day was about to turn to be the most gloomy for not having any known friends around and then my watery eyes saw a face that instantly brought a smile and hurray there I see a girl whom I recognised at once! Not that I knew her since long but she was the one who was ahead of me while taking the admission. We did exchange the names but I hardly remembered but did remember her face – how can one forget such a beautiful mysterious face. But the happy moments are momentary; we were placed in different classes!!! Anyways for a happy girl like me the fact that someone know is around was enough and so the journey began….

Few days passed and one fine day I see a little girl with bouncy hair in a frock and shoes coming to the class along with the boys. Not very clear what but something in my heart said that she is the one with whom I can be friends with. Shy character of mine restricted me from starting a conversation and so few days went by analyzing though started being friendly with the boys – classmates!! And soon made friends with most of the classmates and also with the one which brought smile to my face on the very first day!

I am still trying to adjust in the environment and the exams days were announced. Was astonished to see others getting tensed and I am like – so what! Like time waits for none; exams came and went but the actual fun is when results are out

1969409_10152562970443104_891339446768065412_n — The surveying lab, where we all gathered to TRY and learn. It was more of a break from sitting in the classrooms 🙂

I was never a studios student but always scored distinction in the school so was confident of it while looking to the result sheet on the notice board. And what; my exam number is not listed in for Distinction!! I scrolled down thinking maybe a first class but no I don’t see it…I keep searching for my number but didn’t find it in second class too…. I scrolled to the last grade Pass class and my face beamed like a sunshine – there it is – the very first one!!! Always contented and happy the way life placed me I was happy that I passed and so did my new friends. The days passed with a new learning each day and a remarkable one is that we have to open the window for atmosphere to come in!!! (which I religiously follow today also!!) While I Am still trying to adjust with the university environment, new friends, new learning’s and exploring the ways to find fun in load of term works and the tensed atmosphere; year end is declared and soon we had to face the exam. This time had to give my best shot so can get transferred to a better stream of engineering. Results are out and yes I passed out and also did get a change in stream from IWM to Civil (is it better is still a question) but then am happy as had made my own place in the lobby!!

The year started with the shuffle of students and I got separated from newly made friends. The new class had more girls then the earlier one but seems they didn’t like my face! Except for one tall slender beautiful girl sitting on last bench with a spark in her eye and slight curve to her lips which attracted me and I shared the bench with her unaware that she would turn out to be my friend for lifetime. I found a new friend but still I longed for the break time when I can meet the other two friends. Days passed by with routine sharing of hi hello and a smile and when did it turned into mingling for short and then long gossips, term works, group reading and sleep over; I also really don’t remember – maybe that’s what is called friendship! and so evolved a gang of four which turned out to be the notorious gang due to its mix flavor of being naughty hotty and intelligent! A gang that dared to challenge the opposite gender, played pranks with both the genders, engaged in day long discussions at times arguments and still managed to be friends with all.

But as we all know that what has started will come to an end and so did these carefree days too. We now gathered in the auditorium to receive farewell party from our juniors; felt as if it was just yesterday that I was standing in the center square of the faculty all alone and today we are seven – seven different individuals with diverse qualities woven in an invisible bond – Friendship: a relation that is created by us which is beyond any expectations. It’s the space where we can be ourselves, speak of our mind; see what we like to see and hear without prejudice; so very eternal. Blessed are those who are able to get connected in such divine relationship – yes I am!!

Seeeemmmaaaa … wake up its morning! Don’t have to go to the office…”

10505437_10152562969238104_4542440920703910958_n — FACULTY OF TECHNOLOGY AND ENGINEERING. M.S UNIVERSITY, VADODARA.

A Woman Of Substance!

I am not sure why, but this holiday season she keeps coming to my mind. She was like the wind; not the harsh wind that blew things away. But the gentle one that knew how to slide under the wings and give everyone it touched a gentle lift, just enough to get them going again. She was and is Jayne!

Always smiling, in the six odd years that I knew her, not once did I NOT see her smile. She smiled through it all; her chemotherapies, the x-rays, the lab tests, the doctor appointments, the last days when she knew she was fading away and yet her attitude of looking at the abundance of good never left her.

I met her for the first time at the kindergarden introductory meetings. Her enthusiasm was infectious. It was almost viral. She taught me how to volunteer, how to look at the positive and not freak out at my son when he came with a B- or a C+ grade. I remember even today, we were sitting outside the first grade classroom, and she was picking on sweet peppers like they were candy and it was just two moms yakking away when I mentioned, wish my kid could read as fast as his friends. She looked at me straight in the eye and said, “do you know your kid is the only one who raises his hand and says, he did not understand?” I am thinking that’s bad, right..she says, why, he is only 6 he has his whole life to learn to read so fast that no one can understand what he is saying, but he has only a few years to ask questions, soon he’ll be a man and expected to know it all. I was zapped, what she told me was so true and yes, I did back off and surprisingly, the more I calmed down, the faster my kid learnt. Even today, she keeps me in check.

She moved on to the heavens four months ago to stupid cancer. I hate cancer. The void continues to be there. She touched every life with her amazing love of life. She was a fighter, a believer and above all a friend. I feel blessed to have known her.

She was a daughter, a wife, a mother, a friend and above all, she IS a woman of substance!

Sunset evolves into a peacock.

When I started this painting, I was wanting to make a sunset, I don’t know when and why the brushes started moving towards blues and greens. And before I knew it a peacock was taking shape. After the first coat, as I was putting it away to dry a little, I got an FB update from Jayne’s page, stating she loved peacocks and wanted to be remembered by them. At that point, I knew this painting was for her. She loved the vibrant colors and pride of the bird. Jayne personified peacocks.

Jayne’s peacock

I feel blessed that I was able to make this for her and give it to her too.

I know you’re smiling down on us this holiday season. The heaven’s are never going to be the same. They are going to party like never before. We all love you and miss you!