Shilpa Verma – Page 7

Death Valley National Park – It’s different.

2015, was a year of adventures; The Last Frontier, Alaska to the desolate Death Valley, we covered the spectrum of life to death.

This winter we took our annual driving trip to Sedona and Death Valley. Our route was SFO, CA – Sedona, AZ (with a night halt in Barstow) – Death Valley, CA – SFO, CA. This was long, but well worth it. Sedona, AZ is beautiful but Death Valley National Park took the award for this trip, so starting with the second half of the journey. Sedona will come later.

The drive to Death Valley National Park is boring, dry and full of desolation. It doesn’t matter which side of the country you enter the park from, it’s just miles and miles and miles of barren land. Nothing, absolutely nothing for miles, then suddenly a travel center and you breath a sigh of relief, refill the gas tank, make a bee line for the restroom, grab your coffee refill and then start driving again. Be careful as you drive into and exit out of Death Valley – Hwy, 190 is a well maintained highway that curves through mountains with 9% grade in certain parts. It has very little signs and no cellular service. Keep paper maps handy.

FullSizeRender — Death Valley National Park – A overview Map. This saved the day as were driving out of the park.

The drive maybe dry, but the story behind how Death Valley came to be is rather interesting. The Unusual Story of Death Valley centers on the Pacific Coast Borax Company and the 20-mule team. Back in the olden days, when Death Valley was a land untamed for man, some brave souls mined Borax and it was transported via mules. In fact as I heard in Death Valley (I love to talk to the locals – cashier at the general store, the rangers at the visitor center and so forth. Their stories are either their experiences or what their grandparents told them. Definitely more interesting than the internet.), the 20-mule team was a household name in those days. In fact the Borax Company also laid the foundation of Furnace Creek Inn. It wasn’t long before the good folks of Borax Company realized that the travellers were attracted to the desert for its raw beauty and the lore of the mule teams.

FullSizeRender_7 — The 20 Mule Team Barn at Furnace Creek Ranch – a treat in itself.

They say that “universe works in mysterious ways,” this couldn’t be truer for Death Valley, one event led to another and we fast forward to February 1933, when after years of waiting, Death Valley was officially crowned the Death Valley National Monument. In 1934, the National Congress gave it the park status. Today, Death Valley is 3.4 million acres of stark, powerful and impressive landscape that attracts over 1 million visitors annually for its clear starry nights, craters, sand dunes, fault lines and snow.

It took us 6.5 hours to drive from Sedona to Death Valley. We wanted to stop midway to see Hoover dam, but after seeing the 3 exit long line, we changed our plans, because we wanted to reach DV before sunset. DV takes pride in its night sky, so there are no lights whatsoever on the way to the park or inside the park roadways. It’s just you, your car headlights and maybe a car light in your rear view mirror. Word of advise, if you go to Death Valley National Park, please plan on reaching there before sunset. It’s not dangerous but the silence can be eerie in the still of a dark night.

After driving for miles with no one in sight, it was a relief to see this sign. Excitedly we took our turn and were very pleasantly surprised to find our resort way beyond our expectations. Xanterra is the company behind Furnace Creek . They have two properties, the absolutely beautiful Furnace Creek Inn that charges a little too much I think, but then the views from the location are stunning and you pay for that OR you can try the common man Furnace creek Ranch (where we stayed) for about $200 per night for the deluxe rooms. The rooms are nice, clean, come with the standard amenities and 2 queen beds, but the money is for the French doors that open into a patio and a common green grass area. It’s walking distance from the play area; pool, tennis courts and they have fire for those cold desert evenings. The Ranch has 3 restaurants on site and that’s a blessing after a long day of hiking and walking OR you can get creative and take little rice cooker with you. We were blessed to have friends who treated us to some delicious food every evening J the property also has a RV park and camping grounds for the more adventurous souls.

Furnace Creek Ranch – An excellent family friendly Oasis. Very nice rooms and the patio opening into the open grass area with fire pits was perfect.

This is the inside of the Furnace Creek Ranch – a mini oasis indeed.

Day 1 in Death Valley started with a visit to the Furnace Creek Visitors center. As a general rule, every time we visit a non-commercialized national park, the visitors center is a must stop. The rangers are extremely helpful and give good advise on the must see and do hikes.

We were there for 2 days and since we were sure we wanted to be back at sunset, the plan for us was:

Day 1:
Ubehebe Crater, Sand Dunes, Zabrinski Point,
Day 2:
Artist Drive, Badwater Salt Flats, Natural Bridge and Dante’s peak.

The bummer – no Scotty’s Castle and Golden Canyon hiking. They both were closed due to flash floods. Good news for you, Spring 2016, the dead lifeless rocks will come alive with an abundance of wildflowers. It’s going to be a riot of colors.

We started on our journey. Ubehebe crater is about an hour drive from Furnace Creek. It’s an easy no car in sight route J Just make sure to follow the signs and stay away from areas that are zoned out.

Ubehebe Crater:

The crater is 600ft deep and ½ a mile across. A maar crater, the steam and gas explosions created it as the hot magma heated and all the steam gushed out. The rim of the crater can be viewed from the parking lot and the view is absolutely breathtaking. More than anything, it is the empty vastness that boggles ones mind. You can hike the rim or go down 600ft and experience the solitude and magnitude of the crater. Walking down the crater is moderately easy. There is a marked trail, however loose gravel and gravity can cause a slip or two, so be careful. Walking back up is exhausting and can be tiring. Walking the rim is again moderately easy for the most part. There is loose gravel and a little climb, which makes it tricky. If you get tired, take breaks and walk at your own pace. Once you reach the Little Hebe crater, pause and just breathe. Sit down and soak in the calm and peace. It’s a circular 1.5-mile walk around the rim, so regardless of which direction you go; you will end up at the parking lot. The rim walk goes through many other smaller craters.

Part of our troop did the Little Hebe walk and part when 600 ft. down into the crater. Once both groups were back, we took our photos and headed to the Mesquite sand dunes.

FullSizeRender_1 — The Ubehebe Crater. PC: Ansh Verma

Mesquite Sand Dunes:

A desert is any place with less than 250mm of annual rainfall and you know there are cold deserts such as Antarctica and hot deserts like Death Valley. Regardless of the kind of desert, one look at the sand dunes, and I realized how tiny I was and even tinier was my footprint.

What is the first thing that comes to your mind, when you hear the phrase. “Walking on sand,” Beach, right? Of course, we always associate sand with beach, when there is so much more of it in the desert. I wonder why and then I started walking on the sand dunes and understood. When we walk on the beach, the sand is cool and sort of tickles our feet and the child in us comes alive. When we walk on the sand dunes, it isn’t the tall sand dunes that daunt us; it’s that tiny sand grain in our shoes that bothers us J

FullSizeRender_4 — A Pano of the Mesquite Sand Dunes PC: Ansh Verma

FullSizeRender_8 — The mountains in the far back change colors constantly as the sun sets. It was gorgeous.

FullSizeRender_5 — The Teens wandering off to the farthest corners and the rest of us scattered all over the dunes.

All of us did our little adventure here, the teens wandered off to the tallest and farthest sand dunes, the younger kids, tried to keep up and then decided to roll and play, and us adults, we walked as far as we could and then went on our photo rampage. Somewhere in between I realized it’s been an hour since the two teen boys left and haven’t come back. My continuous cribbing forced my husband and our friends to walk beyond and look for them. We found them and then of course I got the “over protective” mom look. In vain, I tried to explain the difference between an over protective and a cautious mom. All in all, it was a good day. We took some awesome pictures and headed to Zabrinski Point.

Zabrinskie Point: Is an overlook. Boring? It is quite the contrary. The elevated overlook, just a few miles east of Furnace Creek on Hwy 190, is a photographer’s paradise. Best viewed at sunrise or sunset, it makes for some stunning photographs and un-paralled views of the badlands. I’ll let the pictures do the talking here.

FullSizeRender_10 — The Sunset Sky at Zabrinskie Point

FullSizeRender_11 — .. And he walked alone to explore and make his own way.

FullSizeRender_12 — Birds of the same feather flock together. These are dead lifeless rocks and yet they are so alive. The colors were breathtaking.

FullSizeRender_17 — It took nature centuries to create this imperfectly perfect landscape. As the sunsets, the eerie nature of the rocks starts creeping in. PC: Sangeeta Srivastava

Back at the resort, our friends treated us to delicious biryani by the fire pit. As a special treat, we did some night sky watching too. So ended a perfectly perfect day.

FullSizeRender_16 — The Fire demanding respect.

FullSizeRender_14 — We saw him and more constellations. So much for all the progress we have made.. one has to go away, very far away to see stars.

Day 2: Artist Drive, Badwater Salt flats, Natural Bridge and Dante’s Peak.

Artist Drive: I was excited to see this. I had read some good and some okay reviews but either way, just the name intrigued me. It’s on the way to Badwater Salt Flats, and again, it’s just you and the desert. We were lucky to have friends with us, but if you go solo, it is you, your car and the desert. Don’t let that intimidate you. Learning to enjoy your own company is a life skill. The drive is an easy loop. It’s called Artist Drive because there are a variety of colors in the formations. The pictures are self-explanatory. The drive also makes an excellent stop for “sitting on the road” photos.

FullSizeRender_3 — Great drive to sit down in the middle of the road and soak it all in. There are a few cars around, so have someone watching out for you 🙂

Badwater Salt Flats: This is the lowest point in Death Valley. It is 86meters below sea level with miles and miles of table salt J Yes, it is mostly sodium chloride and as we were driving to it, I understood what the word “mirage” means. On a bright sunny day, it looks like a pool of water. Why go to Bohemia, when you can see them right here in the USA, though I have heard that the Bohemia Salt Flats are just WOW. Many couples choose it as the backdrop for their wedding photos. Backdrop or not, Death Valley Badwater Basin Salt Flats should be included in your “to see” list

Natural Bridge: On our way back, we took a short detour to Natural Bridge. It’s an unpaved road to the parking lot and then you hike for a mile to a that rock formation that looks like a bridge. It’s a short hike on gravel, relatively easy, but take water with you.

FullSizeRender_13 — We saw a flower blocking at the Natural Bridge parking lot. Survival of the fittest 🙂

By now, it was post lunch and we were hungry. We headed back to our resort only 20 mins away and had lunch. The kids decided to unwind, and found their way to the tennis courts at the resort. As the day was ending and our little one was “exhausted,” we chose to stay back and watch the 4 kids, while our friends made their way to Dante’s View.

Dante’s View: Directly above the Badwater Basin, it is the highest point in the park. At approx. 5,000 feet it has seen a fair share of snow this year and the local folks of Death Valley are looking forward to the flowers. The photos are courtesy our friends.

And so ended our two day stay in Death Valley.

Death Valley National Park, CA should definitely be one of your bucket list items. If the pictures above did not excite you enough, then maybe knowing that Star Wars IV – A New Hope was filmed in Death Valley, will intrigue you to go see it. Blogger Steve Hall shows you how and where. Still not convinced, here are 3 more facts so you can start planning your Death Valley vacation.

South of Alaska, it is the biggest national park.
Badwater Basin is the lowest point below sea level in North America and just 15 miles from it is Telescope Peak at 11,049 feet and the sheer drop makes Grand Canyon look shallow.
The area was named by a woman in 1849. This is another interesting story. One brave group of miners trying to reach CA, during the gold rush decided to take a short cut via Death Valley only to realize that there was no vegetation or water for either the animals or themselves. Slowly they perished and as the remaining were exiting the park, one woman looked back and said “Good Bye, Death Valley.” The name has since stayed.

Death Valley is beautiful and dangerous. Its enormity mocks the petite human and yet its is grandeur allures us to walk straight into its badlands. “The Force” was definitely with us and we made it safely back home, with a fleeting feeling that yes, we will be back.

Dear 2015…

Dear 2015,

It’s time to say good-bye. Tonight the world will celebrate your departure with a drink, a dance, a kiss, a movie and just a chilled out evening. Either way it will be celebration that ends with a loud shout out of “HAPPY NEW YEAR.” Tomorrow we will welcome 2016 with open arms.

Tonight, I sit surrounded by love and joy reflecting on the year almost gone. 2015, every year, I wonder why do we wait till the end of the year to celebrate? Why do we wait for the NYE to make a resolution and improve our life? Few weeks ago, I was making my annual family greeting card and thinking of captions and quotes to summarize my wish for 2016. I decided on “the best is yet to come,’ and then it struck me, NYE is about hope. “The best is yet to come.”

It is this hope that keeps the world moving. It is hope for our loved ones, it is hope for a world with peace, it is hope that our kids will find a world better than ours.

Hope is the kinetic energy for our soul, it is hope that keeps the flame of positivity alive and makes us all human.

So you see 2015, If you agree, then there really is no right or wrong way to celebrate NYE. Whether we a choose to watch the ball drop in the comfort of our home or party the night out, we celebrate hope as we wish. We do what is needed to keep us moving forward, because that is what NYE is all about. It is about dreaming the impossible and hoping we will be one step closer to that dream before the next NYE rings in.

2015, you brought in tears and joy alike. From the birth of a royal prince to the celebration of Marty McFly and Dr. Emmet’s vision to the many wars; It’s been quite a year for you and I am sure you are tired and ready to call it a night.

On a more personal front, between you and me the story wasn’t any different. You pulled out all the tricks and tried your best to keep the downward spiral going but then hope stepped in and the spiral reversed. Hope showed me the last frontier, hope brought in old school friendships I had forgotten, hope encouraged me to pick up the painting brushes again and most recently hope (read hubby) fulfilled long over due bucket list item and seeing Sedona and Death Valley. More importantly hope reminded me that I am only responsible for myself.

You taught me that as humans the only super power we have is to keep moving. No matter how tough it gets, no matter how much life sucks, we have to get up every morning with a smile and hope for a good day.

2015, I bid you farewell tonight. I wish you luck and I hope you have a wonderful afterlife. Tomorrow when 2016 knocks on the door, I hope it will have a great year and bring happiness and good health for one and all.

Remember, “The best is yet to come.”

With love,
Shilpa.

44 years and counting…

“She stops staring and instead smiles at the mirror, for now she is a year older and a year wiser. She is no longer afraid or shy because she knows it’s not the leaps and bounds but the one confident step every time that makes the journey possible. And for that she is thankful not to herself or god, but to her better half. He doesn’t surprise her with roses and diamonds but yes he took the shy little girl by her hand and continues to introduce her to the confident girl that was and in some ways is still hiding inside her. He tells her that at this point she should do what she likes.” The Shy Little Girl looks at the mirror again and realizes she’s been on this planet for 44 years now. She compliments herself. The dark circles, the grey hair, the extra pounds, the sunspots, the fading eyesight, she embraces them all because they are a gentle reminder of a continued life. She continues to stay wary of the crowds, but with every passing day she is losing her camouflage, and sometimes that worries her. It worries her not because she will be found, but more because she will no longer have the super-power to be invisible.

Where did time go? It seems like yesterday that I, as a tween was taking my first step of independence as my mom said her goodbyes to me in my hostel. It seems like yesterday when I met 6 amazing girls in engineering college and it truly is a miracle that they are still a part of my life. It seems like yesterday when I walked down the aisle and waived goodbye to my parents and boarded the flight to USA and started my own family. 44 years later and here am I today – thinking about all the “seems like yesterdays” and smiling to myself, for I survived. Life is full of variables and every variable has a constant that becomes visible with time. We are all a product of our own experiences. My experiences have taught me a few lessons that I believe will help me survive the next 44

Death is a reality. Life is fickle. We all have to die sometime. Don’t make it harder on yourself by not doing what you want to do today. Live your dreams, so when your time comes, you know you have lived your life.

Fill your and another’s bucket every day. How many of you know the story How Full is Your Bucket? I love this story. If you haven’t, listen to it and fill your bucket everyday. I had forgotten about this until a 5-year-old girl reminded me. Now, I try to fill my bucket everyday.

In the grandeur of the Universe, you are a speck. Nothing more and nothing less – just a speck, so stop thinking the world of your self. No matter how smart you are there is always going to be someone smarter than you. Instead be humble, your humility will help another shy girl come out of her shell.

Keep life simple. The more we have, the more complicated it gets, so try and have the minimum apps that you need to survive in this techy world.

Let children be children. When they create a fuss, within reason cater to this fuss. They fuss with you because they know they can. They fuss with you because they know you can take you for granted. Let them fuss, because when you were a child, you fussed too and your parents catered to your fuss.

Don’t become a teenager. Post 40 life is hard for many. There is a sudden desire to dress teen, act teen and be teen. Why? You are lucky to be here, the privilege of turning 40 and beyond is denied to many; don’t try to turn the clock back. Celebrate your curves, edges and the years.

Money is relative, is needed and the same is true for success. You will need money to survive in this world, how much you need, is the relative part. It is not about how much money you have, it is about what you can do with the little that you have.

Find friends in the real world. Try to be THAT one friend to someone who can be taken for granted and find ONE such friend for yourself too. Value your friendship more than your pride and say sorry first. This holds true for all other relationships that you value.

Think positive and surround your self with positive thoughts. Stay away from those who concur with your negativity. Embrace those who disagree with your negativity, for they are the ones trying hard to bring out the best in you.

The Universe is always listening and giving us clues. Pay attention.

Romance and love are not the same. Romance is conditional. Love is unconditional. Love is what brings out the best in us.

If you try to make everyone happy, YOU will be the un-happiest person. This does not mean you need to be selfish and self centered, it simply means that solving every problem in the world, is not your job.

It’s okay to vent out. Remember THAT one friend – cleanse your soul by venting out and then go back to filling your and another’s bucket.

This birthday was the realization that I NOW know how to enjoy my own company. I can still not eat alone or go to the movies alone, but I can be myself and not get bored. I am my best friend and no one can be me. 44 years – is the oldest and youngest I can be today and why wait for a celebration, celebrate yourself. It’s time to make every second count and keep filling those buckets.

Happy Birthday to me!

Divergent Education

Parenting is an interesting journey. As a new parent we swear not to make the mistakes our parents made and then with every passing day, we become our parents. We revisit the unfulfilled ambitions and hope our kids will fulfill them one day. We start teaching them to see the dreams we have for them, and there is absolutely nothing wrong in it, if your child agrees with you, for the most part, they don’t. This disagreement is what keeps the circle of life going. Imagine if every generation was like the generation before, we would probably still rubbing rocks to create fire.

This past weekend, November 6th, I saw the much talked about movie “Most Likely to Succeed.” This movie is a dauntless allegation proclaiming the failure of the education system. It is a wake up call to parents and schools for demanding change. Through interviews and perspectives of educators, innovators and the change guru’s it proves its point – the education system is failing and does not prepare our kids for the future that lies ahead of them.

Over the years as a parent, my observation has been that the education industry is the only industry in the world that makes sweeping changing in policies, its product and or process with absolutely no input from its final consumer base – the students. If the question to a student were, “would you like to present your knowledge or test it?” What do you think will the majority answer be? I will be very surprised and in some ways intrigued if the majority students come back saying, “test it.” The movie attempts to answer this question. Ted Dintersmith and Greg Whitely present historical data and follow the modern HighTech High School in San Diego, CA to understand this alternative approach to teaching where the traditional textbooks are chugged for project-based learning. The teachers of the school acknowledge that while the kids who go to High Tech High, may miss out on the breadth of topics learnt, they are definitely getting a better depth of knowledge and in addition they learn the soft skills of communicating, leadership and learning to fail while not giving up being one of the most important ones.

For me personally, the highlight of the movie was the split second shot of the student Brian smiling at the end of the movie. The movie showed us a very powerful image – Brian and his team were not able to complete the project assigned. They missed the deadline and yet the teachers acknowledge his vision, they give the student time to contemplate and understand that having a vision and implementation in a team setting requires grit and tenacity. The student had nothing to show and yet he was not penalized, he was given time to continue and succeed. This is a life skill that can only be learnt by experience.

The current education system lacks this very important concept – kids need room to fail and then they need tons of patience from their mentors to help them succeed. When everything from class participation to quizzes and tests are graded, there is no room to fail. One bad test grade and their grade for the quarter is ruined. How can that be right?

The opponents might argue that grades are what the colleges need. I agree, grades are needed and as long as there is demand from colleges for the GPA’s and grades, the system cannot change. This was a missing element in the movie. There was no feedback from the college admission personnel. Are they willing to chug the grades and base the selection process solely on interviews. Today, college application process is million-dollar industry. Parents are paying insane amounts to counselors so they can fine-tune the essays. The applications are engineered for success and thus killing the free spirit or creativity again.

Some movements can start at the grass roots while some start from the top; the change in education has to come from the universities. The universities have to step up and say, we don’t need GPA’s; we need students who can lead, who can communicate across personalities and nationalities. These are attributes that can only be seen and experienced.

124 years ago the Erudite designed the education system, hoping to create a world filled Candors, Amity and Abnegation. Together, the intelligent, honest, selfless and peace loving humans created a Divergent world. A world that is connected by invisible bridges. Bridges that connect many clouds of information. The student of today needs to know how to walk these bridges, gather information and bring it down to planet earth and create a better environment for all.

To serve the needs of this Divergent world, the education industry needs to break out of its allegiant model and evolve.

Spooky Loving HomoTeens.

Yes, they are a species of their own. The number 13 has always been associated with let’s just say “not so fun” things..and so is it a surprise that as soon as your hugging loving child turns 13, they start pushing you away. They demand independence because they are 13. They say they are adults now. Really? You ask why? They say.. well because I am 13.

When my journey into the teenage world started, I was confident none of the stories would hold true for me. I had after all done the right things, and had a great relationship with my child. The proverbial open book kind of relationship and then it happened..a few new chemicals in the blood stream and boom… they turn into Homoteens – I had no clue about this new species and as I soon discovered, neither does the scientific world, they are only now beginning to research and understand why the Homosapiens evolve into Homoteens. Something about the prefrontal cortex not being developed. Do I really care about it as a mother? Do you care about it?

Don’t get me wrong, the science helps – it helps because it makes us, the parents realize that our child is normal and is going through the expected path of development, and just like the baby Homosapiens don’t come with instructions, neither do the Homoteens. You are pretty much on your own as a parent. When a baby cries, the world sympathizes with the parents, when a homoteen cries, the world mocks the parents and feels sorry for them. Such is the world we live in.

2 years into this and I continue to be amazed at how quickly these kids grow and sneak up on us. These are all brilliant kids doing silly things because its fun. I see boys with the audacity to walk away when their parents are talking and I see girls being feisty and quick to quip back, and then there are some who hide themselves in an imaginary world with their heads bowed constantly and we as parents just stand and watch with our mouths agape wishing that if only they talked to us.

The struggles will always be there, the distractions stay, the priorities dwindle, but life will find a way. The hometeens will stand up again, slowly but steadily. The will become tall, strong adults. Will they choose the pathways their parents designed? Some will and some won’t. Will they be successful? Yes, they will be, but their definition of success may not be an engineering or medical job with a cushy salary and a big house. Their definition of success might be remote working and traveling the world and you as a parent will have to accept that, for that’s how the world is now.

The world has changed. Every industry has gone through a transformation so why should the human being be left behind. Just as the teens are evolving, we the parents will need to evolve too. Teenage is a fairly new concept. 100 years ago this species did not exist. I think we the adults created them … we told them you are 13 now, you are a grown up now and so you should act like one. When the truth is they are not grown ups, science is proving they are not mature to make many decisions and often their judgement is clouded. We then tell the kids ok you are 16 start driving, but you can’t vote yet, then we say ok you can vote, but you can’t drink alcohol because you are not an adult yet. They officially become adults at 21, so why have we created these 4 different stages of in between adults.

Hug your spooky teen no matter how hard they push. Hold them close to your heart when they scream at you. Let them feel the warmth of your body. This warmth soothed them when they became; and it will soothe them today too.

Today its Halloween. When a group of tall, short, spunky, loud spooky homoteens ring the bell, give them candy, don’t wonder how and why the cute costume co-ordinated halloween buckets converted into trash bags and pillow cases, just give them candy and say Happy Halloween.

They are still kids, trying to find their place in this crazy world.

Happy Halloween! Let us celebrate the loving spooky teens and preteens.

4 life lessons revisited and learnt.

It’s been a year since I stopped blogging regularly and I had my reasons. I was angry at many things in life, and every time I wrote, I wrote dark. I did not like that about myself. Life is not all happy, I know that, but writing to me is a way of sorting the unhappy from happy and when only unhappy comes out, its hard and takes much more effort to dig through the pile and drag the happy up. This was important for me. I have always taken pride in my capability to adapt and adjust and when the unhappy was stopping me from doing that, it was frustrating.

We are all a product of our experiences and it is the change that these experiences bring to our lives that makes us all human. The experience of losing my last grandparent, seeing the effects of cancer and how it changes lives and most importantly seeing how relationships change in times of stress, these experiences taught me the most important lesson of all: “life as we know it, is very fickle.”

Lesson 1: Life is fickle, it changes with the flip of a coin.

So, what’s the anecdote to this. It took a while, but slowly and steadily I am learning to live for one day only. Live as if this was your last day. So god forbid, if something happened to me overnight, tomorrow morning there won’t be anyone cussing me, but instead they will remember that I waved to them randomly as I walked my kid to school.

Lesson 2: Forgive, Forgive, Forgive.

This is the only thing that works when friends or foe hurt you. It’s the hardest thing to do, but it is very important to move on and stay at peace with the world and most importantly yourself.

Forgive the colleague who took the laurels for all your handwork or the love you loved and it went away or or the teenager who used the only power they have to be rude and insulted you or those who keep asking you why you don’t work. Forgiving does not mean, forgetting what happened. It just means that you have healed. The scar will always be there and remind you of the pain. But cherish that scar, for that scar is a reminder of your triumph and how you overcame that pain. Forgiving someone does not mean that you need to be friends with them again, it just means that you have accepted them for who they are and are choosing to walk away to be at peace with yourself.

Lesson 3: Be yourself.

This is the universal truth and also one that we never actually make an effort for. Why? Maybe it’s the mixed messages we get in our life. When we were little and forgot the little things, we were told; “try to remember, its important to remember things,” and as we grow up we are told; “please try to forget, its important to look at the big picture and not the tiny details.” We tell our kids, make your own pathway, be a leader, but yes don’t forget to learn piano and get your A’s like the other kids.

We contradict ourselves daily and don’t think of it as same.

You will get a different advise at every phase of your life, and that advise is not necessarily bad advise, its appropriate for that moment. It is the change in advise and lack of empathy that comes in the future that creates the problem. So as you strive to forgive and be yourself, listen to everyone’s advise, do what makes sense to you and once you make that choice, don’t blame the world for it. A bad grade in school, a project gone wrong, a sour relationship, a burnt dinner, an angry child or simply a backload of laundry, these are all choices you made, not the world, so accept the shortcomings with the same grace as you smile at the applaud.

Some one told me yesterday – don’t short sell yourself and don’t take a step down. Stick to your guts, the struggle is there, but every failed effort is a step in the right direction. You may not have the right answer now, but you now know what won’t work and that’s HUGE.

Lesson 4: Surround yourself with positive people.

This is imperative in this crazy world. Surround yourself with folks who are good at heart. It does not matter how big their house is or how old their car is. As long as they have a good heart, you are in good hands. Remember the little boy who wandered the deserts looking for the Alchemist, well he taught us all one thing, “when you want something really bad, the universe comes together to make it happen for you.” This is very true. The Universe like us also has its mood swings and attitude problems. If you surround yourself with negative folks, you will attract more unwanted unhappy in your life.

Look for people who tell you, “yes life sucks right now, but its a phase and this too shall pass.”

Often we ignore to receive a call or make an excuse to not answer the call and sometimes it is just our pride that stops us from calling or texting the person. Appreciate that person who takes the time to call you, or write to you. They have choices. They are choosing to spend that moment thinking about you.

Today, I choose to ignore the negative, nurture the positive and move on. By doing so, I am sure the fickle life will slowly learn to stabilize itself. After all it’s life, it blooms in the most unexpected places.

blog3 — LIFE ALWAYS FINDS A WAY. JUST BE PATIENT WITH IT.

The Last Frontier – Denali National Park.

It’s been a delight taking the Alaska virtual tour with all of you. The final phase of this tour is a trip to Denali. As our last phase we start driving from Talkeetna to Denali National Park. Before we start driving , lets take a quick walk through history to understand how Alaska came to be. The word Alyeska – an ancient Aleut word means “The Great Land.” Great it is, the shoreline of Alaska alone is greater than the U.S Atlantic shoreline. In terms of size, Alaska is Texas, California and Montana combined and the best part, you actually get paid to live in Alaska. Yes, the few brave souls who dare to be different and live here get paid by the state government every year.

Denali is the Athabascan name meaning “High One.” and Denali National Park is different from any other park you have seen in the United States. More than a park, its a preserve, it is a 6 million acres of land across Alaska with only one road running through the park. The local obstinacy to keep it as natural as possible is so strong that Denali Park Services use dog sleds instead of snow mobiles during winter. When a fellow tourist asked why are snow mobiles bad, the naturalist asked us a question; Which sound is more natural in the forest, the roaring snow mobile engine or the howling dogs? We all shook our head in agreement. I told you, folks who move here are intelligent, smart, resourceful and almost eccentric 🙂

Let’s start driving to Denali. It’s a beautiful drive. See for yourself. Looks like any other mountain road, right? How about now? Blew my mind away. Notice the different vegetation. That’s the Tiaga Forest. Tiaga is a Russian term meaning “little sticks,” an apt name for these thin forest trees. They look like Xmas trees on a diet 🙂 At about 2700 feet Tiaga makes way for the Tundra. Tundra is a fancy word for the dwarf trees and tiny flowers that grow in the valley beds. Wildflowers and shrubs in the Tundra are adapted for the short growing season. Just like the short tourist season, summer is short here too. In August, we were already seeing the fall colors peeping out in some plants.

For me personally, seeing the Tiaga forest was a treat. I had read about it long long time ago in our geography books but never thought I would see it. Interestingly even though tiny, their presence is just as humbling as the Redwoods. Tiaga biome is the largest biome on earth. It extends all the way into Russia. It’s closeness to the Arctic circle brings in long bitter cold winters to short wet summers. The climate demands adaptation and respect for nature. Here’s another view of the beautiful glaciated waters of Nanena River flowing through the park and the forest.

And one more.. I was mesmerized by the sheer enormity of these tiny trees. Just imagine them lit like Xmas trees amongst the Denali. It’s North Pole and I am sure Santa comes here first 🙂 The construction equipment is a reminder of the human hand and was the perfect juxtaposition in this scene.

We kept driving with no GPS and yet we were not lost. We had the Alaska App. Yes, the state has its app that works without data or WiFi, a blessing indeed. Since its just one road in and out, directions are pretty simple, but yet one needs to make sure how far the destination is. The app pulled up our hotel name “The Grand Denali Lodge” and its phone number. With that, we made sure we did not miss this beauty perched high up on the hills.

As we turned, interesting signs stared coming our way. I found this one quite amusing. Another fun fact we did not know, Alaska has mosquitoes and lots of them.

As we get closer, it gets prettier and we are all super excited.

Notice the name of the different tour companies. That is why it is important to book through a tour company. It’s a little more expensive, but you get the best of the best. We booked ours through Alaska Tour and Travel (www.alaskatravel.com) And I give them 200/100. The staff is amazing. They operate 7 days a week and open as early as 6.30am. I highly recommend them. They did an absolutely fabulous job with our trip and the hotels they are affiliated with are definitely the best in town.

The Grande Denali Lodge for instance has the best view in town,better than Princess Cruise lodge or any other. See for yourself.

Yes, the clouds were coming in and the weather was perfect for some spicy tasty Pakora .. but we had to settle for Sweet Potato fries at the lodge restaurant. Expensive but good. They catered to our very picky vegetarian and kid specific palette and did a fabulous job. They also have an up close and personal bear 🙂

The next morning we took at 6.55am tour to Denali National Park. The bus picks you and the other passengers up from the respective hotels and then drives you into he park. Unlike other national parks, Denali allows private cars only for a few miles. If you want to go deep into the park, the tour buses are your only option. When you research on Denali National Park, interestingly you will find many people saying “skip it.” The very fact that they said this, made me want to go 🙂 Now I can tell you why? Here’s my take on it. When you go to Denali, don’t look for Yellowstone or the Muir Woods there. You won’t find it. It is unlike any other park for it is an International Biosphere Reserve. The predator – prey balance is as natural as it was before mankind discovered the park. Every effort has been made to make sure that the animals have minimal interaction with human beings and their habitat stays as natural as possible. Yes, you can hike but we didn’t. Our group had an age bracket fro 1.5 years – 70+ and everything in between, so we decided to go lazy and sat in the bus as it rolled meditatively through Denali. Did we see animals? Yes we did.

Can you spot the bear? This is a picture form my iPhone, I am sure professional camera’s got a better view, but you get the idea of how far these animals are from the road.

The tour buses have come up with a creative way of showing wildlife to the tourists. They point their fancy camera to the animal and we see them on the screen and of course we take a picture of the screen 🙂 We saw quite a few animals.. bears, caribou lots of them, Dhal Sheep, Ram, Birds but no Moose 🙁
Here’s a clearer shot of the Caribou. Trivia question for all of you – What’s the difference between a Caribou and a Reindeer?

As the bus rolled along, we crossed some amazing sites and soon the tree line vanished to be replaced by rocky mountains. I took this picture because it reminded me of “THE THING.” How many of you know what “THE THING” is?

This is a 7 hour long tour. We get stops in between to stretch our legs and breathe in the beauty. This view made me feel there is someone up there watching us all and since we are so close to the Arctic Circle, it has to be Santa. Right?

We came dow safely after meandering through the single lane roads and taking in all the beauty. Our evening was all about buying our tiny trinkets and ending it with a scrumptious dinner at Prospectus Pizza. Highly recommend this place it has a crazy selection of Pizza and their bruschetta is amazing. A view of the Denali Boardwalk 🙂
The next day, we were tired but very excited to do the ATV tour. Unfortunately I did not take too many pictures of the ATV tour, but again I highly recommend it. Our toddler enjoyed it and the 70+ were thrilled by it. So it’s safe and yet exhilarating. The pic below is of the sand mountain. I liked it for the contrast and how abruptly the tree line ends. This was the last stop in the ATV tour. And so ended our stay in Denali and we drove back to Anchorage for one more night before we boarded our respective flights to go home. One last shot of Denali.

After days of pasta, sandwiches and pizza, we were all craving for some good wholesome Indian food. Well at least the grown ups were, the kids would have taken Subway over Indian 🙂 But never the less we found Namaste Shangri-La – Good food and a very typical ambience.

Another place we tried during our first leg of the journey was the Indian restaurant Yak and Yeti – a whole in the wall place, but good home cooked meal. If you want a non-greasy home cooked meal, then Yak and Yeti is the place to go. They even sell chai by the gallons 🙂 Yak and Yeti is co-owned by a local Alaskan and a Nepali who came to Alaska and stayed. I am told their Himalayan Chicken is outstanding and I enjoyed their simple dal with Aloo-Gobi.

We said our good byes to each other with the desire to explore again.

Life is an adventure. We are born to explore. As babies we learn by touching, feeling and observing. As we grow, we start Googling and life then becomes a routine with blah and boring days. Life is not about being born, going to college, getting a job, paying bills, saving money for a house, saving more for retirement and then dying. In Alaska I met many who lived life by the day. They most likely didn’t have a bank balance or a house, some of them maybe didn’t even have a permanent address and yet they were not complaining. How do I know this? Why else would they be coming to Alaska every summer for year after year.

Can I do it? I don’t think so. I missed the boat 🙂 on this one, but I am wiser. Alaska taught me to take one day at a time.

Alaska – we will see you again. This time in winter. Yes, I know I am crazy, but where else can I find a Ice Hotel but in Alaska. Till then, keep traveling and explore.

The Last Frontier – Part 2

Travelers are attracted to Alaska for its roadless travel and rugged outdoors. I was attracted to Alaska for a simple reason, I wanted to see the land where the sun stays awake for 20 hours, takes a power nap and is up again at 4.00am. I thought it would be disorienting. It was quite the opposite. This is a sunset view at 11.30pm and we had just finished dinner 🙂 By talking with the locals at the hotels and in and out of our tours, I quickly realized one thing – every Alaskan deals with the long days in their own special way; some take in between naps, some don’t sleep for 48 hours and some just invest in heavy duty light control drapes. One way or the other, they find time to sleep and enjoy the bountiful of nature.

Up against the horizon you see Mt. McKinley or The Denali Mountain as the natives called it. This is a view of The Denali Mountain during day time.
Our second day started with a tour of the Anchorage Museum, which is a must see if you are a history buff and if you are not, start driving to Talkeetna. Our destination was the Talkeetna Alaskan Lodge (http://www.talkeetnalodge.com/) our base camp for the next two nights. This lodge is the only place you want to stay in Talkeetna. There are other lodges and hotels, but if you want to see Mt. McKinley in your backyard then this is it and yes the view comes with a price, but its well worth it.

The Talkeetna Alaskan Lodge – rolling hills and Denali with outstanding service and every room is a room with a view.

Alaska is the only state where the dog mushers and their Alaskan huskies are celebrated like the Hollywood stars. If you go to Alaska, meeting the stars of the Iditarod races is a must do item. Iditarod? you may not have heard of the race, but I am sure you have heard of the movie Balto.. well think of these dogs as the modern day Balto’s. The Iditarod race commemorates the “Great Race of Mercy,” a real race against time that saved lives threatened by disease. This real race inspired Balto 🙂

We took the Sun Dog Kennel Tour in Talkeetna, AK. The hotel shuttle gave us a ride to Talkeetna downtown and from there the Kennel folks drove us to meet the stars.
Every March, the 1049 miles Iditarod race starts from Willow to end at Nome. Nome by the way is a tiny town in the middle of nowhere, take a few steps beyond Nome and you might just find yourself in Russia. These strong hardy sled dogs race through the frozen tundra’s with their musher. It is one man and 16 dogs working as a team. Here is a map of the race, with the Musher and his sled.

Here is a glimpse of the dogs pulling the ATV. You say WTH? I said that too. But the dogs are not really pulling the entire 2000+ lbs load.. they are tied to it.. the ATV drives itself and the dogs run.. that’s how they get their exercise during the summer months. It gives them exercise and the mushers get their money in the form of tour fees to keep it going in the cold winter months. A very creative business idea. Please don’t think that the dogs were mistreated or are being abused.. these animals are loved and very well taken care off. We saw their facility and it was clear that the animals were family and well loved.

This little guy is 2 weeks old.

I am not a pet person. I don’t dislike animals, it’s just that I am incapable of communicating with them. That’s my handicap not their’s and I am not exactly proud of it, but that’s who I am, so when I saw these mushers and their families devoted and so dedicated to the nurturing and caring for them, I was humbled by their unconditional love. We left the kennel with a warm and fuzzy feeling and rested before our next adventure, when we meet the skies with K2 Aviation.

When we arrived at K2, we were armed with our winter jackets. Why you ask? Well, going on a glacier flying high into the mountains, it is reasonable to assume the air will be cold,right? Wrong. Turns out the temperature at the glaciers was only about 10 degrees cooler than the land and it was 80+ F on the land. Yes, Alaska can get very warm too. It is much more than permafrost and snow. So looking like absolute city folks we were politely told, we can take our jackets if we want or else we can leave them in the bins. We left them in the bins.

An aerial view of the mountains. The tallest peak is Denali.As the pilot approaches the landing area – I look at the crevices and wonder how will he land in such soft snow. And then we land and step on to glacier.

I gently stepped out and looked beyond, and silently said to myself, Shilpa “welcome to Planet Krypton.” Ok, yes, I am a Superman fan and if Krypton was real, this is how it would be; Crystal blue skies with mountains of dark blue Kryptonite covered in snow. Another plane lands on the glacier. We asked the pilot who owns this area and manages it. He said, no on owns it. Multiple people use it and respect each other and the glacier. Again, a simple thought and yet so novel for us city folks.

In the brief but ever lasting 20 minutes, we took our pictures, the kids made their snow angels and we were on our way back.

One last look at the mountains from the best seat on the plane – co pilot. The teen in the group got to be the co-pilot on the flight back and took some amazing picture of the sun peaking through the clouds and the tundra below.

PC: Ansh Verma

Before the glacier landing experience, I was nervous. I thought it would be an overwhelming experience to stand on a glacier amongst the mountains as high as my eye could see, but it was not. With mountains on all four sides, the mild fog caressing our warm bodies, I felt nestled in.

The seas of Alaska were like the wild and unbridled youth, full of adventure and the want to explore, the mountains remind us to be mature, patient and calm. The world may call them a Volcano, but until the balance is not tipped, they stay at peace with themselves and the world around them.

I now wondered what the forests would feel like. Alaska, you continue to tantalize.
The Alaskan Tiaga forests tomorrow. Stay tuned.

The Last Frontier – Part 1

Vacation for me is about slowing down. It’s about feeling life again. This summer, we discovered Alaska.

Thank you Russia, for giving it away for 2 cents an acre to US. It was the 49th state, and like the saying goes – “save the best for the last,” Alaska truly is. It is state unlike any other. The people who live there did not just end up there, they chose to live there for they were worthy of it. Living in Alaska is not everyone’s cup of tea. There is something in the wild Alaskan air that draws fiercely independent and almost eccentric folks to its shores. Why else would teachers from NC and students from CA move to Alaska during the summer to drive buses and be tour guides. These folks travel to Alaska not to escape life, but so that life does not escape them.

Imagine wilderness without any fast food chains, major restaurants and a single road going in and out of cities. The whole state is an open playground for both kids and grown ups alike. The 20 hour day frees its residents from the clock and they make the best of the midnight sun to climb mountains, dive into oceans or just sit and marvel at the beauty of Mt. McKinley.

Join me today as I relive the magnificence of the state. While most people take the cruise, we decided to forego the cruise; instead we did something much better.. we took every mode of transportation possible. It was “Planes, Trains and Automobiles” at its best and we added boats, ATV too.

We start off with a trip on the Alaskan Railroad. Not sure of what to expect, the kids and I think grown ups too had their own doubts, however once we boarded the train, we were all in a happy zone. It’s a treat and a ride on the Alaskan railroad is a must.
As we travelled from Anchorage to Seward, we were beginning to see why Alaska attracts 1.5 million visitors annually.

After a 4 hour journey, the shores of Seward welcomed us with clear blue skies.

From the Seward Harbor, we set sail on the Kenai Fjords Cruise – a 6 hour boat ride to experience the raw unbridled frigid waters of Alaska.

Through out the entire vacation, I could not get over the skies of Alaska. They created magical wisps of air that I had never seen before and even better than that was seeing a smack of Jelly fish right next to the boat. Nothing that I write can do justice to this experience. To see these invertebrates up close alive and swimming in an open ocean was surreal.
PC: Ansh Verma

And then this – I am sure you know this one; but wait, its not the Orca. These are Porpoise – their cousin the Dolphin is more famous. But the Porpoise are just as friendly. As soon as the captain saw them, he asked us to make more noise. The rails of the boat were being beaten by the frozen palms of excited audience and the Porpoise excitedly showed off.

PC: Ansh Verma

And then the boat sped towards the final attraction – the glaciers.
A picture is worth a thousand words.

As we head back, everyone was still in a trance and scanning the pictures they had clicked when the captain announced Humpbacks.. and off we all jumped to get a glimpse of this beautiful mammal and we were in for a treat.

After the cruise, we took the Park Connection bus back to Anchorage. As the bus made its way back through the one way road, I could not help but marvel at the raw beauty of this magnificence state. I had seen whales before too, however to see them agains the majestic mountains and glaciers is an experience to be experienced.

It is true, everything about Alaska is larger than life. From Mt McKinley at 20,320 feet, its’ the highest peak in North America to the glaciers that are bigger than countries, days that never end and nights that never start, Alaska had given us a glimpse of its unpolished humongous beauty. The basic human instincts to explore was alive and we all were experiencing life again.

Tomorrow we take a ride with an Iditarod Dog Musher and then fly around Mt. Mckinley to land on a glacier. Stay tuned.

Boring Boredom!

We are officially half way done with summer and some of us are desperately waiting for schools to reopen while some of us (like myself) wishes the vacations continue for ever. Why can’t we just have a year round school.. study for one unit, take a break and then go back. So much better, don’t you think. As adults, don’t we feel like taking a break every 2-3 months, then why deprive the kids of that luxury. Anyways, I know most of you are rolling your eyes and wondering what planet I come from. Well, it’s the same as yours, Earth, I just don’t like the constant drilling mode we are in.

Why is summer a bummer and a stress factor for so many parents? Why do parents worry about their kids getting bored? Seriously, since when has a bored mind become a bad thing. Mind is a machine and like every other machine it needs its downtime too.

Okay, before you say anything, I do realize that I work from my home office and my kids have the luxury, but so do yours. Honestly, they do. I tried giving this idea to a few moms this year and they looked at me like I was Dorothy making a wish. Here’s a possible solution – your kids have friends – some very nice, some okay. Meet up with their parents and form a group, 5-6 families and have the group of kids go to the respective homes turn by turn. You get your kids only once a week and yet they are out of your way without any major expense or structure. Again, I know this solution does not work for everyone, but it’s a worth a try, isn’t it? Infact, I wouldn’t mind doing it with my kids too. I tried selling it, but it did not fly with many. I wondered why? I am still wondering why? If you have insights, please do share them.

Overtime my kids complaint of how boring it is, I tell them it’s okay to get bored.It’s perfectly okay to hang upside down on the couch and stare at the ceiling. They are getting bored, not tortured. Their bellies are full, have clean clothes and not a worry in the world.. that’s a lot to be happy about. Over time, the frequency of “I am getting bored” has gone down – they find their thing now. When they can’t find anything better to do, they both end up in the backyard.. sometimes screaming at each other, sometimes playing with each other. At first, every time they screamed, I ran outside to calm them down because I didn’t want the neighbors thinking I have unruly kids. Now, I don’t. In my heart I know what the neighbors are thinking – this mom has no control or she does not care. Quite honestly, I am keeping an eye on my kids, but I have realized one thing, the over parenting I have done in the past years back fired on me. The kids today take life as an entitlement and I have a problem with that. Life is a gift and its a privilege to have clean running water, the kids need to understand that, but they don’t. It is important for these kids to fall, hurt a knee or two, be in pain so they realize the joy of not being in pain. It’s not easy, especially in today’s times when we judge each other with a magnifying glass. Why? As parents, aren’t we all in the same boat, so why do we judge? Why do we credit the success or failure of the child to the parent? Is it the parent who got the honor roll or is it the parent who went to summer school? Neither and yet we judge.

This summer, I realized another thing, as parents we take way too much credit for the success of our kids and we blame ourselves way too much for their failure too. If a parent watches their kids like a hawk, that’s okay – we all have our fears and our reasons are our own. The smart parent though will watch and speak only when needed.

Just as a clarification – it took me two years to get here. Two years ago, I was the helicopter parent and I sadly thought hovering was ok.

It is important for these kids to have nothing to do. It is important to get bored, because that’s when they will be forced to open those long lost tubs of goodies and make things happen. When they create their own play, summer will suddenly be magical. Human beings are creators and inventors. If you Google the history, the most brilliant ideas came from a lazy activity. What do you think Newton was doing under an apple tree? I am pretty sure he was lazing around.

I am not undermining the efforts or the kids who do strive to succeed and like to stay busy all day and want something to do. The point is if they can come up with ideas, give them the tools to make those ideas a reality, but don’t think of the ideas for them. In my house today, there are only three ideas, electronics, tennis and hoola hoops and somewhere in between tons of food. Quite honestly, thats okay with me.

I let my kids run wild in summer. Most parents will disagree with my strategy, and quite honestly, I don’t know if I am right or wrong. Time will tell. What I do know is I want my kids to enjoy being home and in turn enjoying being with me and that’s all that matters. I continue to try hard and not worry about what classes my middle schooler will get or who will be my daughter’s teacher.

I am hoping that this freedom to get bored and find a way to snap out of the boredom will also teach them to take what life gives them and make the best of it.

Have fun this summer with your kids. They are going to be in your nest for only 18 years before they fly away to build their own nest. Give them memories that will make them come back often.

If you are bored of reading this, too bad, because I had a blast writing this 🙂